Category: Meet Onome

I’m so excited, y’all; we are almost getting there. This is the month that made me realize pregnancy is so long; it felt like the calendar was so slow. My baby’s movement increased, and sleep became a big deal. If I get four or five hours of sleep, that is a testimony. I would roll all night and watch my husband sleep soundly; I was always jealous, like how can you sleep so soundly in a few minutes, and I’m struggling to get some sleep.

I was getting tired already and just wanted the pregnancy journey to end. It was harder because I wasn’t getting writing gigs, and I couldn’t apply for a full-time job because I was pregnant. I felt so useless for days, I would complain to my husband every day, and he would assure me that I would get the big break. I am not used to doing nothing, so waking up in the morning and having just one gig felt like I was sinking. I remember talking to my friend Dami aka my Elizabeth, and she said to me, “Onome, motherhood is a purpose on its own; why not enjoy this phase and allow God to lead you”. Those words stayed with me, and I decided to start journaling.

I wrote letters to my baby each day and fam; it was soothing.

How did I forget to tell you about my church conference (SMH)? Wafbec was the highlight of month 6 (Wafbec is the acronym for West African believers convention. The Covenant Christian centre organized it. It was usually a 7-day programme with morning, afternoon and evening sessions.) Wafbec 2022 was such a spiritual awakening that gave me an assurance that God has not forgotten me.

How come nobody ever told me about feeling so hot? It’s like my body generated heat. I had to be in front of the fan every minute. It was not funny. I hated that I was sweating a lot, so I was itching my body every minute. There was nothing fun about that.

Another crazy symptom that showed up in month 6 was haemorrhoids. I had this before getting pregnant, but it doubled in size and became painful during pregnancy. There was a time I couldn’t use the restroom for about four days, I had the urge to, but I just couldn’t. I prayed and hoped for a miracle, but nothing happened. It was so painful each time I tried, so I reported it to my gynaecologist. He told me he couldn’t give me stool softeners because they could cause a contraction, so he had to do a rectal examination, which was about 20 minutes of pain. By the time he was done, I felt like using the restroom, and it all came out. Phew! The relief and joy, never have I been happier to use the restroom.

Pregnancy is an unfamiliar journey that takes a lot of resilience and strength; it’s also beautiful to know that a whole human being is growing in you. If you are pregnant, take it easy on yourself and don’t forget to ask for help when you need it.

Let’s meet tomorrow as I tell you all about Month 7. Thank you for being here.

This was a beautiful month. My bump was already visible, and I did not enjoy going out as much because I didn’t want anyone to know I was pregnant, lol. It is not for any spiritual reason. I’m just that kind of person who hates showing my workings. I want the world to see the results and be wowed. I would rather talk about the process, but pregnancy said, “No, baby, not this time; the world gotta see the workings.”

This was the end of the year, so everyone was preparing to travel home for the festive season, but all thanks to pregnancy, we had to sit down in Lagos and look for ways to entertain ourselves.

One evening, I suggested to my husband that we should go for a two-day vacation after Christmas. Surprisingly, he said yes (Going out stresses that, man, we complement each other well because I hate going out too, lol, I was not expecting a Yes). He told me to pick a location and let him know how much it cost. I was so happy.

I woke up the following day and started searching, I found one within our budget, and I was so excited. Well, something happened that shattered my dreams. My laptop of more than three years decided to crash; boy, that was devastating. I had a lot of deliverables, and I didn’t even know what to do.

I decided to borrow my friend’s laptop since she had an official system she uses at work, but the problem was that she was travelling and she had to take her laptop with her. She gave me for some days so that work could continue.

My sweet husband went to Ikeja some days later and got me another laptop. He had been saving up to get an external screen to help him work faster and easier, he planned on getting the screen in January, but he had to use the money for his screen and even pulled out his savings to get me this laptop. I wanted to cry (blame it on pregnancy hormones) because I was shocked. I didn’t even know how to thank him.

Ladies and gentlemen, you know what that means, I had to give up my vacation dream, and I was contented because this man had gone out of his way to make me happy. We decided to have a house party.

With the help of my friend Ashley, I cooked some sumptuous jollof rice, gizdodo, croaker fish coated in sauce and Chapman. It was a full menu; even though I knew it was stressful, it was all worth it. I had another dizzy episode some days later, so I was forced to take some compulsory rest.

One episode I won’t forget in a hurry was feeling pains in my lower abdomen, I can’t describe the pain, but it was hell. I couldn’t do anything, I have a high threshold for pains (maybe not so high), but you rarely find me crying about pains. This time I cried like a baby. I could not sleep. Nothing was working, my husband tried giving me massages, but it wasn’t working. My sweet friend Ashley didn’t even know what to do, I hate to see them worried about me, but I couldn’t pretend I was in pain for the first time.

When the pain refused to stop, I found my way to the hospital. I did a scan, and it showed the baby was fine. The doctor gave me a reason for the pain and prescribed some pain killers. I took the painkillers, and I felt better the next day.

I also had a mini gender reveal party with my husband, and Ashley was behind the camera. Keeping him in suspense about the gender was the sweetest thing. He would ask me if I’ve changed my mind, and he would say something like, “Hey, you won’t tell me now so that I know how to structure my prayers for the baby” I would laugh and tease him.

About a week later, we had the balloon set up, and I asked him to punch it as we did a gender reveal party. It was simple, sweet and funny. My husband had no preference for gender; all that mattered to him was that we were going to be parents!

I was happy to be back, but at the same time, the doctor warned me to take things easy, so I had to take a lot of time to rest. Before I knew it, it was cross-over night, and I was the happiest.

I started the year with no plans of getting pregnant, but God definitely had bigger plans. 2021 was a year I won’t forget, I couldn’t achieve much, but I was grateful to do the little but, more importantly, for this baby growing every day in my stomach.

That sums up month 5. Let’s meet with our popcorn tomorrow as I give all that went down in month 6.

Welcome to my month of Victory hehehehe. This was the beginning of sweetness. The vomiting stopped totally, and I could see the world. This was the month I could say I started loving my baby. I registered and started my antenatal.

This was also the month I met someone special. I call her “My Elizabeth”; she is Damilola Agboola; this woman was heaven-sent. We met at church house fellowship, she reached out to me after our first meeting, but I was still not in the mood. It was in our second meeting we bonded and became sisters. She just had a baby, so she could relate and connect with me.

Damilola fed me like a baby and treated me like a queen. She would pray with me and check up on me. There was a time I battled with fear. I had terrible dreams, and each time I told her, she would say to me, “you can’t lose this baby Onome”.

Feeding was better, but the challenge with month 4 was dizziness. If I do anything stressful, I will start feeling dizzy and throw up. I don’t know how to stay still; that was why the first three months were hard. I always want to be busy. I remember how I fell one evening in my bathroom. I was stressed this particular day. We were renovating the house, so there was a lot of moving. I was not comfortable seeing Jumoke and my husband do everything, so I went to join them. I also had to read for my exams, so I was stressed.

All I could remember was opening the shower. The next thing was that I found myself on the floor. I screamed for my husband, and he had to come carry me. My head and arm were bleeding. To make it worse, I threw up everything I ate that night. I became so weak. Once I knew stress was a problem, I avoided it because feeling dizzy was no fun.

This was the month my dad turned 70. Since the beginning of the year, I looked forward to this, but pregnancy happened, which meant I couldn’t be there physically. My siblings and I planned a surprise for him, so I really wanted to be there, but because of the dizzy episodes, I knew I had to sit down in Lagos.

My brothers made sure I didn’t miss out of the fun. We were on video calls and phone calls throughout the day; even though I couldn’t be there physically, I saw my old man look so happy, which was fun for me.

My stomach was growing, and I gradually added the weight I had lost in the first trimester. Life was good!

Tomorrow, I will tell you all about month 5.

               

This was a very dramatic month; I felt I would die at some point. The vomiting increased, and I had to visit the hospital. I was told I couldn’t register for antenatal until week 12 or 13, which was after month 3. The doctor ran some tests, and they discovered I had an infection.

I felt like crying; you mean, I  have an infection with all I’m going through. The doctor said they found some blood in my urine, so they had to place me on antibiotics immediately. The two weeks I spent using antibiotics was terrible. I was losing weight terribly because I couldn’t eat anything.

It was this same month I had my birthday. My husband had a lot planned out, but unfortunately, I was not in good shape. I had lost a lot of weight, so I looked terrible. I couldn’t eat anything; all the food he got for me couldn’t stay in my stomach. I felt for my husband because he got my birthday party all figured out.

I spent my mornings crying because the infection made me itchy and my stomach hurt. Using the drugs was worse, and I just couldn’t wait for everything to go away. I was not even interested in praying. I felt so lonely because I had no pregnant friend around me.

Pregnancy can be a very lonely journey; please, if you can find a young mother around you that you can trust, talk to her. I remember speaking to a friend whose baby was just one year old. Shout out to you, Mary Oladapo. This lady helped me stay calm and shared her experience with me. After listening to her story, I knew I was not alone but all along, I was silently praying for another friend in Nigeria because Mary is in London.

Well, vomiting took a severe turn, and I couldn’t keep food in my stomach at all. Everything I ate was going down the toilet sink. My husband looked at me one morning, and I could see that he was worried. He held me and said, “babe, please try to eat. You look very skinny” I started crying, and I told him I was trying. Just blame the tears on pregnancy hormones because your girl is a hard girl.

My husband had to take me to the hospital on a Sunday morning because I was so weak that I couldn’t keep anything down, and the infection was still there. I got to the hospital, and they did a series of tests again and decided they would admit me. That was how I found myself collecting drips and injections for three days. They gave me more antibiotics, and honestly, the food I ate in that hospital was royal. I guess my baby understands royalty because fam, your girl did not throw up for one day, but the minute my husband brought food from the house, I would throw it up, so he stopped bringing food. Let me pause to thank my baby sister Adeyemi Victoria who had to come to stay with me and help me take care of the house.

I was discharged and given plenty of drugs. Well, the vomiting stopped but not completely. A week later, I found myself reacting to perfumes. Nobody could use perfume around me. Once I smelled it, I would throw up.

My favourite food became something I didn’t want to see. I would barely eat two spoons. I wasted food so much. My sister Adeoye Jumoke had to come around because Victoria was leaving; she had to go back to work. Jumoke made my life easier by helping in the house; thank you, baby girl.

Pregnant women, don’t try to do it by yourself. Take it easy on yourself. If you can get help, please do. Me sef dey advice pregnant women hehehehe.

Tomorrow, I will tell you all about month 3……